Last Updated on December 18, 2025 by Lexi Kisses
The goal of my sex ed class in 2006, was to prevent pregnancy. And, to a certain extent it probably did. Because after taking it I felt afraid at the idea of having sex.
This fear affected the way I interacted with my body for a large part of my life. Not everything from that class stuck with me, but there were a few major mistakes that altered my relationship with sex & myself for the worst.
Mistake #1: Teaching that Sex will Hurt
Most of my sex ed class consisted of how painful periods, kids and the first time would be. It was more of a cautionary tale than an environment that would foster a healthy relationship about sex.
And honestly, I can’t help but wonder if this teaching style was on purpose. You know the whole mindset of if they fear it, they won’t do it. This would have certainly supported their goal of preventing teen pregnancy.
But, the reality of instilling fear about sex is that it also can cause an unhealthy relationship with sex to develop.
Mistake #2: Discussing Heterosexuals Only
When my sex ed class was taught, LGBTQ+ sexualities weren’t even mentioned. As a queer person, I noticed this consistency and it’s one of the factors in me not expressing my sexuality.
This type of teaching fosters insecurities in LGBTQ+ individuals, and is a breeding ground for bigoted views. I strongly believe that most bigoted behavior stems from ignorance, and there’s no better way to be ignorant than to not know.
Mistake #3: Splitting up the Sexes
My Sex ed class, and many others in the USA split that classes up by sexes (usually assumed gender). This is done so everyone can be “comfortable” as well as to teach the sexes different things.
I’m uncomfortable with this practice because it only furthers the notion that the sexes are different, and shouldn’t be comfortable discussing these topics with each other.
This format also does not consider LBGTQ+ individuals.
Final Thoughts
Most Sex ed needs a revamp. I would like the goals of the class to be about developing a healthy relationship with sex & sexuality, while focusing on inclusivity.
I want it to be an open class that promotes growth and self exploration. As opposed to its main use right now, which is to prevent things like pregnancy and promote a hetero normative world (whether that be on purpose or by mistake).
