Intense Ultra Bullet – Review
It was a cold night in November. My partner and I were heading home from grocery shopping. My mind, as it usually does, was wandering to erotic thoughts. That’s when I decided to try my first vibrating sex toy. Giving in to my spontaneous imagination, we added another pit stop: The sex shop. When we arrived, I spent what felt like hours meticulously looking for something simple. That’s when I came across the Intense Ultra Bullet from Nassytoys. Hmm. I thought. This looks basic enough. After coughing up the money and driving home, I was finally going to learn what the hype was around vibrating toys, or so I thought.
Pricing & Product Details
You can find the Intense Ultra Bullet floating around online at varying prices between $20-$30. I picked mine up locally for the latter price.
On the box, it claims to take 3 hours to charge, have a battery life of 2 hours and 20 minutes, and be water-proof. Inside the packaging, there is a USB DC charger and a bullet. To charge it, pop out the “water-proof” plug and stick it into the hole. When completely dead, it takes 1 hour and 21 minutes, which is faster than the 3 hours claim on the box.
Once charged, it lasts around 2 hours and 20 minutes when run on the highest setting. After that, it will turn on, but only sputters and shuts back off.
The water-proof claim on the box is, unfortunately, a lie. Splash-proof maybe, but not water-proof. This baby took one dip in the tub, and it has had nothing but issues.
The Overview
When it comes to the Intense Ultra Bullet, I’m not a fan. I tried, I really did. I used it in the bath, bed, and car, yet I just wasn’t feeling it.
My first impression of this product was awful. Seeing that it said it was waterproof, I was excited to relax in a bath with it. Initially, things were going well. The toy was still working as it should, and there were no performance issues. It wasn’t until I was resting in bed that I was startled awake by a bzz bzz coming from my drawer. What the hell? I thought and opened the drawer. Upon opening it, I was greeted with the Intense Ultra Bullet dancing around. Assuming it was just a one-time thing, I went back to bed.
Bzz bzz
I woke up again by an annoyingly startlingly buzzing sound. Ugh, that’s it. I shut the toy off and held it in my hand, making sure I wasn’t being played with by an overly friendly ghost.
Bzz bzz.
It sprang to life another time.
I thought of all the reasons it could be doing this, then I realized it was not waterproof, I had to act fast. I couldn’t just leave it in salt because it would aimlessly bzz bzz all night until it died. So, to fix this issue, I had to peel off the silicone button and dry it out with a cloth. Officially deeming it not water-proof.
I will give credit where credit is due and say that despite its size, the bullet does produce impressively strong vibrations. As for good ones? That’s up for interpretation. I find that the 7 vibration speeds to be lackluster. They feel jabby as opposed to smooth and rhythmic.
To top it off, the paint job chips easily and the button on the base of the bullet may as well be a beacon because it’s exceptionally bright; good luck not being blinded in the dark.
Conclusion
As I’m sure you can tell, I am not a fan of the Intense Ultra Bullet. It’s jabby, hurts my eyes, and wakes me up in my sleep. I did find uses for it since it’s already part of my collection, but all and all, it’s a fluke to me when it comes to pleasure.
This product doesn’t seem to have a reputable place to buy it online, though I do still see this brand and model floating around sex shops.
Looking for a better product? Read my review on Shane’s World Sparkle Vibe.
